I consider myself a professional troublemaker
I’ve always been into sex.
But not in the way you might be thinking!
I was born with a fascination about how we express love.
I’ve been a sex educator, psychotherapist, activist, and academic for 20 years. (If you’re interested, you can see my Professional CV at the bottom of this page). But although I come from an academic background, my true calling arrived through a difficult personal experience. Early in life, I met my first soulmate and we married. We had an incredible relationship, but after nearly a decade of marriage, I lost my libido. Gone. And I couldn’t figure out how to get it back. I tried supplements, hypnosis, and a small fortune on therapy, trying to find out what was wrong with me.
I felt defective and blamed myself. My partner felt inadequate and frustrated. I wondered….
“Why don’t I enjoy intimacy like other people? Is this all there is to sex?” We unfortunately divorced, because we couldn’t recover our sexual connection with the tools we had at that time. It was beyond devastating, but it set me on my mission to understand the nature of the erotic.
Suddenly finding myself single and struggling with romance, things got messy. I asked myself the questions you might be asking now…
What creates desire?
Why do I feel turned on by some people but not others?
And how do you keep passion alive in a long term relationship?
I was aching for real intimacy,
but I didn’t know how to let love in
One day, everything changed when a friend invited me to a sexual tantra class. Electricity raced through my body and I wept with joy – I’d found my true spiritual path. I began to study sacred sexuality, and I immersed myself in tantra, Taoist practices, and many other philosophies that marry the mind, body and soul in sexuality. I discovered that all along…
…the missing ingredient from my sex life had been a sense of the sacred.
I awakened to the holiness of my body and learned to harness sexual energy as a source of power. I learned the necessity of pleasure as medicine, and that emotional intimacy has everything to do with sex drive.
I also knew the traditional model for relationships didn’t work for me (or hardly anyone, as far as I could see) and even though I was a couples’ therapist, I was completely confused about how to make a relationship work in my own life.
I woke up to the reality that we all have the power to step outside of conventional norms, to write our own script for intimacy, guided by our soul and not society. I believe that first and foremost…
We have to love ourselves in the way
we long to be loved.
It’s been 8 years since that day I walked into a tantra class, and what I offer you now is the culmination of 20 years of professional experience, with the lessons of my personal journey. Through my educational programs, I help people claim sexual wholeness, power, and pleasure.
I’m told I give good permission
And even if we never work together, I want you to know – everything you seek is already inside you.