Menopause is an Ego Death, and I've Got You.
🥳 I am officially in menopause. Your congratulations are welcomed!
👑 You might be thinking this is brave or un-sexy to “admit”, but one of the greatest gifts of menopause is that you stop caring. What delicious freedom!! And for f*ckssake, every woman will go through it. Why don’t we talk about it? I refuse any shame-narrative that we become less attractive if we do.
👑 This month marks one year since I’ve bled, after 5 years of perimenopause fraught with serious health conditions. I’m not gonna lie - for me it's been a nightmare, set to the backdrop of a global pandemic, long stretches of crushing isolation, and philosophical ruptures in *ALL* my social support networks - which was traumatizing to my already fragile system. I was totally unprepared for this passage and had to scavenge for guidance, mostly in reaction to severe physical symptoms.
👑 So - now that I’m on the other side, I’m sharing with YOU some pieces I wish I had known 5 years ago.
Some women sail through menopause. That may be the case for you! Hurrah!
👑 But for most, menopause is a dismantling of Self, a deconstruction of your identity, and a death-rebirth process.
👑 The more you resist this, the more you will suffer (I did), and the longer you will delay your UPGRADE.
👑 The good news is - menopause is a profound initiation to your Secret Powers - powers that have been hidden from you until you have the wisdom to use them properly.
But you must go through the Shadowlands and face your deepest fears to get your Secret Powers. It’s a Heroine’s Journey that unfolds in mappable stages that I WISH I’D KNOWN ABOUT but didn’t. Now that I do - it all makes sense.
👑 The most important challenge of this Heroine’s Journey is that you allow your old Identity to die and make space to grieve who you once were.
My ego death came from gaining 30 lbs overnight. I’ve been forced to confront my vanity, self-absorption and over-identification with sexual attractiveness. This brought on intense shame and anxiety, I can’t even tell you what horror it’s been (no weight loss advice, please). I’m finally in acceptance of my new voluptuousness and actually kinda rocking it.
My breasts went from a B cup my entire life to triple-Ds! I call them my floatation devices and they’re actually super helpful for snorkeling. 🤣
If you’re in your 30's or 40’s and vaguely aware that this transition awaits you, don’t worry. Keep cranking out your mission full-force, you are in glory days. I do suggest to get your health in tip-top shape by 45, and clean up your microbiome.
👑 But YOU will have your own initiation my love, and you will face your own worst parts and inner critics in order to make peace with them. It may topple you for a moment. Let it. Embrace the medicine of the death-cycle and prepare a soft place to fall.
👑 If you’ve been through the transition and emerged as a Queen in her Full Power, I bow to you. I get it now. I could not grok this odyssey, and the courage it requires, until I went through it myself.
👑 From menstruation to motherhood to menopause - It’s unfathomable to me that, after all we endure, women are not worshiped and catered to day in and out. After 50 we should be QUEENS, plump and pleasured, lounging on red velvet, fanned with palm fronds and fed chocolate or french fries or whatever the f*ck we want, dispensing orders on how to rule the world.
✨ Now - I am emerging from the journey, at full power and filled with light. Turned on more than ever.
Because this life stage has appallingly few supports, and I’ve amassed a scholarly vault of research....
⭐️ I've created an affordable support circle for women in - and approaching - the menopausal portal.
👑 The Passage to Power 👑
Share with any women who would benefit.
♥️ You're not going crazy, I’ve got you, my love.
